The Mallet of Understanding

Wielding the tools of cluelessness correction with a compassionate and well manicured hand.

Wednesday, February 09, 2005

Librarians! Quick! Hide your copies of "The Color Purple"!

Excusé moi while I hoist my lavender tights as a way of girding my loins. Now, where did I put my violaceous Mallet of Heterosexual Understanding?

It seems that Mr. Gerald Allen, representative of District 62 in the Great State of Confusion Alabama has proposed a bill to ban books that "...sanction, recognize, foster, or promote a lifestyle or actions prohibited by the sodomy and sexual misconduct laws of the state."

So, in effect, Mr. Allen wants to pull such classics as "The Color Purple" by Alice Walker.

And who would be in charge of determining which books would be pulled from the shelves and burned on the steps of the Alabama statehouse? Certainly not *this* clueful librarian:

Jaunita Owes is the director of Montgomery's City County Public Library. She feels that pulling books off the shelf due to unfavorable content adds up to one thing... censorship. "I don't think it's the role of the state of Alabama to, in essence, dictate to me as a parent what I can and cannot read, and that's what we're moving towards when we do this.

Gerald, poopsie-kins, head up, eye forward, this won't hurt a bit.

*WHAM!*

Get a clue, mister representative. Reading books does not spread queerness. Obviously, *not* reading them spreads ignorance and we all know that's a field ready for the sowing of the tares and thistles of violence and homophobic hatred.

Honestly, some people's children...
(With gracious thanks to my legion of mignons at "Crooks & Liars" for the information)


Serious note: Threats against any citizen, no matter how much you disagree with him are just plain wrong. I use humor of a violent nature to make points, but to actually convey threats to this or any other of the clueless makes you worse than them. If you choose to contact Mr. Allen, please show basic human dignity and respect. Don't be a vicious troglodyte.